"Why are your Children not in school?"...Dealing with comments

[Mayfly]

I was home educated at secondary level in the 1980's. To cut a long story short I couldn't settle at public school and there was nothing else suitable locally.

Looking back at it really the only problem was the stigma from the local county council social services and a bit of jealousy from older siblings who had been to boarding school. The great benefit was having the time with my parents who sadly both died before I was 31. Aslo, I became very self reliant and independent and that favoured my career choices. Suffice to say, without formal education, I joined the military, gained the Queen's Commission and had a successful career as an airline pilot. I also achieved a Masters degree, am married with two children and have had a damn good life so far!

But the stigma was a real problem and only ceased when I turned 16 and no longer had to explain to people outside family that I was not at school.

When I talk to people about my experience I usually say that if home education was good enough for Queen Elizabeth, Sir Patrick Moore and Gerald Durrel then it was good enough for me! That usually shuts them up. Also, people are very interested in what the military selection board had to say about my lack of formal education. The selectors told me directly that it was not held against me in any way. The point is that the military are very good at dealing with young people. First and foremost they look at an individual's potential.. They are far less interested in the past.

At the moment we are sending our two children to school. However, if we ever home educated and had the kind of verbal abuse reported on this thread I would simply say:

"How dare you stigmatise my children. Do you realise the damage that could cause their development? Please keep your unpleasant thoughts to yourself".

[JenG]

We often get asked too and over 2 1/2 years have now got used to it. DS used to get nervous and glance at me as if to say "answer then..."
Supermarket cashiers often say "No school today?" or "which school are you not in today? Is it an inset day in your school?" and sometimes I say "No, not today" sometimes he will answer and cheerfully say "I dont go to school, Im home educated... all depends what mood hes in

Ive not really encountered anything really seriously negative, a couple of friends have thought it odd or say things like "But it would be cheaper and you could work and... your heating bills and theyd get a free school meal!!?"

But would it be better for him is how I respond?? I personally dont think so, I have to do it, deal with it and live with my choice and my children are allowed to choose school or not...

[Diane]

Reminds me of something I read a while ago. One little girl was asked why she wasn't at school. She glanced up at her father and then said proudly:

"I'm not at school because it's incest day!"

I cannot imagine what the inquirer thought.

Diane
http://www.threedegreesoffreedom.blogspot.com
New blog entry - In the eye of the beholder

[Jinnx]

My son's not old enough for school yet, but he's got to the age where people sometimes say "Does go to nursery yet?" or words to that effect. I just say "No." and offer no explanation/justification. I think some people find that a bit unnerving, but I quite like that!

Being an @rsey type, I'm likely to respond to queries like "why is he not at school" by asking if they went to school, and when they (presumably) reply "yes" responding with "and look where it got you, stacking shelves in Tesco <or whatever mundane job it is they do>, living the career dream aren't you?"

Disclaimer: I don't have anything against people working in shops/doing mundane jobs, but if people give me attitude they get it back with interest!

[Riaz]

Originally Posted by Jinnx

Disclaimer: I don't have anything against people working in shops/doing mundane jobs, but if people give me attitude they get it back with interest!

I think the worst offenders are the inverted snobbery working class types who have a dislike of children from working class families from going on to what they perceive as middle class careers.

[*onlyme*]

When we started to home school a few weeks ago, I 'warned' my daughter that if we were out and about during school hours, that people would probably ask if she was poorly, had an inset day or why wasn't she at school.

She said she would just tell them she was being home educated and I have had my reply ready for those less informed about home education...

So today we had an optician's appointment and the opticians asked her why she wasn't at school.

She replied that she was being home schooled and they replied by saying: 'Well you will be well ahead of your years then and probably doing GSCE's next week, whish more parents would take responsibility for their children's education'

I was gobsmacked at the positive response!

[Sheila Struthers]

It does happen And often when least expected...

[pendlewitch]

my girls used to say *we don't go to school, we are educated*.

[Ali Admin]

As I tweeted earlier, yesterday's public sector strike allowed us all to get our own back by asking teachers and pupils (as disdainfully as possible): "No school today?"

[Jinnx]

Now my son's a bit older, we've started getting asked a bit. He usually tells them, "I don't go to school, I'm a Home Boy!"